Okay. Time for a confession: I am a pseudo-crafter.
Yeah, maybe that phrase does not exist (yet), but that’s what I’m calling it. I do not know always know what I’m doing, and probably shortcut a few things where I’m in a hurry. So my things are not perfect and would not hold up in a court of crafting gurus, but, gosh darn it, I don’t care. Or, more accurately, I do care, but lack the knowledge and patience needed to make things perfect every time.
Now, I’ve crafted things before. When I was a young child – maybe 7 years old – I did an art camp in the lovely suburb of New Orleans where I lived. For a week during summer, I made things that my 7-year-old-self thought were true works of art. I wrapped a ribbon around a small wreath and glued it in place. I painted ice cream cones on t-shirts. I painted wooden fruit things and glued them to hair clips – I distinctly remember a watermelon. I decorated at least one t-shirt clip (it was the 80’s – no judging!). So, you know, it was all quality art pieces.
As a slightly older child and teenager, I expanded my pseudo-craft repertoire. I made oodles of paper-mache props for a club play. A friend and I to create a scale replica of Shakespeare’s Globe theater for a class project. I laminated quotes from ‘Macbeth’ and them in my own black cauldron of blood (FYI: corn syrup needs a great deal of food coloring for accurate effect) for what is most probably the most disturbing presentation my 10th grade English teacher has ever seen. My bedroom walls were decorated by my friends and a few jars of paint for things like hand prints, Monty Python quotes, and perhaps a MST3000 quote or two. And an attempt or two at very sarcastic IB Art (shout-out to the kids who do the IB Art classes overseas!). All very high quality, of course.
As an adult, I have done very little crafty things. I did repaint an old hutch for the dining room. And I learned how to do ribbon wreaths, which was fun until I realized I have nowhere to put all the wreaths I wanted to make. Besides, ribbon is pricey.
But this last week I’ve been particularly busy as a pseudo-crafter. My mom (who is actually crafty) sewed curtains for most of my house with the caveat that I would sew on the rings. In my limited wisdom, I was like, “yeah, of course I can sew on curtain rings, no problem”. I have never attempted such a thing. Let me tell you: holy guacamole, that stuff takes for-freaking-ever. I sewed on just shy of 100 rings, at approximately 15 minutes a ring because I am slow and pathetic at it. But it got done. And I only poked myself with a needle about 50 times – because a thimble would have been too responsible.
I also painted the crap out of things this past week. First, I decided an old pendulum clock from my parents would look much better in teal instead of plain wood. Then I got both kids plain-ole nightstands and painted them the color of their choice. I thought, “spray-paint will make those silly plain lamps look so much better”, and of course the kids want glitter spray paint, and it turns out there is a definite technique to using spray paint. Thanks, YouTube and Google!
I’ve learned a few things:
- Painting is a patience-driven task. You have to sand the furniture before the first coat. Then you really ought to sand between each coat of paint, waiting for each new coat of paint to dry before sanding. And you’ll have to seal it with something, which means more painting and waiting and sanding, and that sealer will probably require at least two coats.
- As a side note, if you slather on too much paint in effort to go faster, it will flake off when you put the sealer on it. Even if you wait the appropriate 3 days for the paint to cure before you try to seal it, the paint will still flake. Thanks, pendulum clock, for that lesson!
- Spray paint smells awful. And glitter spray paint will get on your fingers no matter how carefully you use it. You know how glitter nail polish is a pain to remove? Same thing with glitter paint. It sticks to skin and is impossible to remove.
- Cardboard is gross. I don’t know what it is, but it always seems dirty.
- I do not know how to clean brushes properly. Between coats of paint, I’d leave the brushes in a Ziploc bag and they’d stay nice and pliable. Once done, I rinsed them thoroughly and lay them out to dry. The brushes are now hard as rocks. I’m not exactly what this means except that I have done something wrong and do not know the trick to it.
- It is easier to sew in daylight than it is at night using the ceiling lights.
- I am never sewing that many curtain rings again. From now on: pockets.
I still have to-dos: slipcover some dining chairs, slipcover for a chaise, paint the chaise . . . maybe at the end of this I’ll graduate from pseudo-crafter to amateur-crafter. Wish me luck!
Live Draw HK
Hello to every single one, it’s truly a
good for me to pay a visit this web page, it contains useful Information.
انتقال نوزاد با آمبولانس مخصوص در تهران
I am genuinely grateful to the holder of this web site who has shared this great piece of writing
at here.
Blippi Shoes Store
Great delivery. Solid arguments. Keep up the great
spirit.
pocketoption
Hey there I am so grateful I found your site, I really found you
by accident, while I was searching on Google for
something else, Anyways I am here now and would just like to say cheers for
a remarkable post and a all round exciting blog (I also love
the theme/design), I don’t have time to browse
it all at the minute but I have bookmarked it and also included your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read a great deal more, Please do
keep up the great b.
numerous online electronics
What’s up Dear, are you actually visiting this web page regularly, if so then you will absolutely get nice experience.
kqbd
Great blog you have here.. It’s hard to find good quality writing like yours nowadays.
I truly appreciate individuals like you! Take
care!!
slot tepercaya
Thanks for finally writing about > Pseudo-Crafter – Hardcover Life < Liked it!
mpo808
You actually make it seem so easy with your presentation however
I in finding this topic to be actually something which I
believe I might by no means understand. It sort of feels too complex and very broad for
me. I’m looking ahead in your subsequent submit, I
will try to get the hold of it!
gojekpot
Good post. I learn something totally new and challenging on sites I stumbleupon every day.
It’s always exciting to read content from other writers and use something from other web sites.
친구랑마사지
Hmm it looks like your site ate my first comment (it
was extremely long) so I guess I’ll just sum it up what I wrote and say, I’m thoroughly enjoying your blog.
I as well am an aspiring blog blogger but I’m still new to the whole thing.
Do you have any points for newbie blog writers? I’d definitely appreciate it.
Electric Transaxles
It’s awesomme to go to see this web page and reading the views of all colleagues concerning this paragraph, while I am also keen off getting knowledge.
Look at my blog post; Electric Transaxles
memek
Yes! Finally someone writes about kontol.
puravive
Everyone loves what you guys are usually up too. This sort of clever work and reporting!
Keep up the very good works guys I’ve incorporated you guys to my own blogroll.
apply visa online
Hi there! This article couldn’t be written any better! Going through this article reminds
me of my previous roommate! He continually kept
talking about this. I am going to send this information to him.
Fairly certain he will have a good read. Many thanks for
sharing!
vpn coupon code 2024
Ridiculous quest there. What happened after? Thanks!
My blog – vpn coupon code 2024
dam prace żuromin
Hi there, i read your blog frokm time too time and i own a simikar one and i was just wondering if you get a lot of spam feedback?
If so how doo youu pfevent it, anyy plugin or anything you can recommend?
I get so much lately it’s driving me crazy so any support iis very mucxh
appreciated.
My blog post – dam prace żuromin
vpn special coupon code 2024
Thanks for another wonderful article. Where else may just anybody get that kind of
info in such an ideal manner of writing? I have a presentation subsequent week, and I’m at the search for
such info.
Here is my website :: vpn special coupon code 2024
Mercedes
If you wish for to take a great deal from this article then you have to apply
such methods to your won website.
Fall
I don’t even know how I ended up here, but I thought this
post was great. I don’t know who you are but certainly you’re going
to a famous blogger if you are not already 😉 Cheers!
facebook vs eharmony to find love online
I’m really enjoying the design and layout of your website.
It’s a very easy on the eyes which makes it much more enjoyable for me
facebook vs eharmony to find love online
come here and visit more often. Did you hire out
a developer to create your theme? Fantastic work!
금천구출장안마
This article will help the internet viewers for building up new web site or even a
blog from start to end.